Friday, September 7, 2012

Gambling. Parties. Alcohol. Sex. If you’re going to Vegas for any of these things, you probably won’




Gambling. Parties. Alcohol. Sex. If you're going to Vegas for any of these things, you probably won't find this guide helpful. Strange and entertaining, maybe but helpful? Not at all. You've been warned.
But why am I excluding the things Sin City is so famous for? Because Las Vegas is more than that. Much more. Also, I should probably disclose that I don t even know how to use a slot machine, I m socially awkward at parties, I think alcohol tastes united airline flight tracking gross, and just the mere mention of sex or nudity in movies makes me giggle like a 10-year-old. Actually, for anyone who knows me, the fact that I vacationed in Las Vegas at all is probably, well, laughable.
Anyway, I will first regale you with my tales of splendor, fun, and awkwardness, united airline flight tracking and then give you tips on visiting the city. If you want, just skip to the Things to Know Before You Go section for the official guide.
Vegas is that crazy friend we all have; the one who always talks too loudly, parties too hard, drinks too much, and wears too little—she's tacky and wild, yet still fun and loveable. And I don't see why, despite our huge differences in taste and morals, we can't still get along.
Vegas is also an odd juxtaposition of opposites, from bright lights to dark secrets, rich casinos to rundown buildings, and all-you-can-eat buffets united airline flight tracking to hunger and homelessness. (Las Vegas actually has the fourth highest rate of homelessness in the U.S. , according to the National Alliance to End Hunger and Homelessness.)
The moment we pulled in to downtown Las Vegas, I was confronted with a huge casino-hotel covered in thousands of sparkling lights, followed by a man in tattered clothing digging head-first into a trashcan on the sidewalk.
We stayed at the Main Street Station Casino s RV park in downtown. If you re an RVer, this place is worth looking into. For just $14 a night, you get electric and sewage hookups, showers and bathrooms, and laundry facilities. Plus, you're in the heart of downtown, within walking distance to the Fremont Street Experience and lots of casinos.
Our first stop was the Mob Museum , which was, oddly enough, the most tame, family-friendly experience of the whole Vegas trip. After that, my sister and I strolled around the Fremont Street Experience, where I got my first taste of just how uncomfortable Vegas can make me. I stopped by a temporary tattoo booth and started flipping through the tattoo booklets, when a tanned young man with slicked-back hair and a strange, New York/Italian accent came swooping united airline flight tracking in right beside me.
I waited as he frantically flipped through united airline flight tracking all the booklets, united airline flight tracking muttering united airline flight tracking curse words under his breath, until he finally found the one. Hey, Baby, he said to me as he held the lion picture up to my face. Ain t that a SEXY lion? Only in Vegas would someone describe a picture of a large cat as sexy.
My dad, sister, and I then went to the Strip around 9 at night. What a complete bombardment of the senses. Thousands of bright lights sparkle and flash everywhere you turn; the smell of alcohol and cigarettes waft through the air; the streets are so crowded, you can feel everyone rub up against you as they squeeze by; and everything is so LOUD music blares as bass pumps from big sub-woofers, people on loudspeakers tell you to come to their show or to their casino, and everyone seems to be laughing united airline flight tracking or screaming about something.
And be careful where your eyes wander. While walking down the Strip, you ll notice lots of people holding stacks of fliers in their hand, which they constantly tap, tap, tap as you walk by. They ll try to hand you a flier, especially if you re a guy. Don t take one! The fliers advertise Totally nude girls! and are covered with pictures of you guessed it totally nude girls. You ll see these cards and fliers scattered all around the sidewalks of the Strip. So I learned early on not to look down as I walked. In case you didn t know, Nevada is the only state in the U.S. where prostitution is legal. united airline flight tracking (I know, I know. I was shocked too.)
For me, Vegas was just as much an investigation into the human condition as it was a vacation. I couldn't help but notice the city has a fake version of everything: the Trevi Fountain, the Statue of Liberty, the Eiffel Tower, Elvis—even the grass outside of some hotels was fake.
It was a strange feeling because, while I was somewhat repulsed by it, I also kind of bought into all the fakeness. When I found out there was a replica of Michelangelo's David, I told my dad, "We HAVE to go see it! It's the one thing I didn't get to see when I was in Italy." I doggedly dragged my dad and sister through the maze of Caesar's Palace for a full 20 minutes until I found the statue. I'm ashamed to say I even took a picture in front of it.
Looking back on it now, it seems silly. How could I have equated a modern-day replica created by some unknown maker  with the 500-year-old, authentic statue that was carefully united airline flight tracking sculpted by one of the greatest artists of all time? Why did I, like so many others, get so excited about the fake things Vegas has to offer? Here s how I see it: maybe lust parades united airline flight tracking around as love, and mirth masquerades as happiness, much in the same way 50-year-old, overweight united airline flight tracking men pretend to be Elvis. Cheap versions. Fake versions. But sometimes we'll settle for them when we feel the real thing is out of reach.
Okay, okay, despite all my prudish discomfort, did I enjoy the city? Yes! It was definitely one of my favorite stops on the trip. Vegas knows how to have a good time, and I m a sucker for anything opulent and shiny. The city has the best shows, the most spectacular displays (especially of lights), and awesome food. So if you decide to go, here s a guide I hope you find helpful:
Vegas is best seen at night, when the millions (maybe trillions, I don t know) of lights have their best effect. Seriously, I kept wandering around, hypnotized by the lights, and wondering, How MUCH is this city s electricity bill?!?
Vegas is HOT (in temperature, I mean), so plan accordingly. Your best bet is to visit all the museums and indoor exhibits during the day, and then peruse the Strip and other outdoor activities when it cools down at night.
If you re planning on taking the little ones, just be prepared to shield their eyes and ears from some unsavory adult things. During the daytime, the city is much more tame. Some good places to take them on the Strip are M M s World, Circus Circus, the Mandalay Bay Aquarium, and Lied Discovery s Children Museum.
Parking: almost all the hotels have free self-parking and free valet parking (but be sure to tip!). I was amazed at the plethora of free parking, a luxury not known in many other big cities. But the motivation behind it isn t so much generosity united airline flight tracking as it is commercial: if you let people park for free at your hotel-casino, they re likely to come inside and spend their money there. united airline flight tracking (Am I cynical, or what?)
Walking: Personally, I enjoyed walking everywhere. Just be careful about your safety, and wear comfortable shoes. I think I walked about 6 miles my first night in Vegas while wearing flip-flops and my poor legs felt it the next day.
This is a covered walkway of shops, casinos, and restaurants in downtown Vegas. It s smaller and older than the Strip, but a bit more family-friendly, and still a lot of fun. Be sure to catch their famous LED light and music show that plays on the ceiling. The high-tech canopy extends more than five football fields in length united airline flight tracking and features more than 12.5 million LED modules and a 550,000-watt sound system. The light shows happen every hour on the hour after dusk. Note: a lot of locals say downtown is more dangerous than the Strip, so be aware.
Great place for RVers, though I can t vouch for the hotel rooms. RV spots are $14 a night and come with electric and sewage hookups, bathrooms with showers, and a laundry room. For whatever reason, the RV park is not advertised on their website. Just give them a call for reservations.Inside, they have a brewery, casino, buffets, and beautiful decor. The hotel is actually rich with history, and you can pick up a brochure to do a self-guided tour of their antiques.
SO sad I didn t get to see the Boneyard. By many accounts, this is the city s latest and greatest new attraction because it infuses actual history into the Vegas experience. Warning: You MUST book tickets about a week or two in advance if you want to go here. They sell out very fast.
Okay, maybe not so much of a tourist attraction, but I thought I d stick this in here if you re looking united airline flight tracking to attend mass while in Vegas. It s within walking distance from Main Street Station Hotel and the Fremont Street Experience. I walked there, united airline flight tracking but there is a small parking united airline flight tracking lot in the back.
Kinda pricey, but so cool! You get to touch real, live stingrays, united airline flight tracking AND walk through a tunnel of sharks! This place boasts over 2,000 animals sawfish, rare golden crocodile, a stingray shark, and turtles, to name a few in 1.6 million gallons of water.
Iconic, retro, and free. If you want to take a picture of it, you can find it at the south end of Las Vegas Boulevard, sort of near Mandalay Bay, and directly across from the Bali Hai Golf Club. It s in a median, united airline flight tracking but there are some parking spots in the median united airline flight tracking by the sign. You may even find an Elvis impersonator hanging around.
This was my favorite hotel-casino to explore. If you can stomach the fakeness, united airline flight tracking this place is a like a cleaner, shinier version of Rome. They have copies of every famous Italy attraction: the Colosseum, the Trevi Fountain, the Forum, and of course, Michelangelo s David (the real one is actually in Florence, Italy, not Rome). The hotel, casinos, and malls of Caesar s Palace cover about 85 acres of the Strip. It is massive. We got lost. But it was always fun because wherever we got lost there was something awesome to gawk at. It s also worth mentioning that this is where the movie The Hangover was filmed.
Free admission. This habitat is located inside of the Flamingo Hotel and contains flamingos, united airline flight tracking swans, ducks,

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